when i'm alone in my room sometimes i stare at the wall...

and in the back of my mind i hear my conscience call... so i just want to purge some of the thoughts that i have had lately... each one of them would make a great entry on their own but lets face it i don't know when i will have the time to write again...

- omg thank the lord for gripe water... got it at whole foods and it works miracles... time the dropper is empty i can see relief come over my baby's face...  whether it was gas or attitude that had her all in a fuss the gripe water calms her down... usually a burp or nap follows... i will take either one

- so after several horror stories about kids being in parents' beds until they can read/write i decided to start putting our little mclove in her crib... i mean i just can't imagine all that decorating her room being in vain and my hubby and i never having our boudoir to ourselves ever again... so i wrapped her snugly and placed her in her crib... (talk about separation anxiety)... my ear was glued to the monitor... just waiting for her to call for me to come and rescue, oops i mean feed or change her... my sleep was not any sweeter with her being all the way across the hall... in fact, i think my sleep was worse because i kept thinking maybe the monitor would die or be covered or even worse, eaten by the monster under her crib and she would be in there screaming her head off all alone... i have to admit that i really missed her... i mean, although i am usually cross-eyed and confused in the middle of the night when she wakes me... those glances at her in the moonlight are priceless... ok so i did not make it through the whole night 'cause i just could not put her back after her first feeding, but i am getting better... last night i fed her in her room in the rocking chair and then put her back... but i just missed her too much to put her back after the second feeding... one night at a time

- cute kid... i have a really cute kid... now that she is getting cuter by the minute i can admit that i was a little concerned those first moments after her birth... i mean its kinda hard to tell when they are still a little covered with blood, head all weird-shaped and lash-less... but now, oh my word... she is beautiful... and growing better everyday... she will be 7wks on friday and she is already making the cutest little noises ever, vowels never sounded so sweet... and she laughs at us... i mean no more gas reflexes but real smiles... she is gorgeous... i am so blessed

- i don't stink anymore... kinda embarrassing to admit but i smelled like a trash can in a public bathroom for the first month after the delivery... i mean peeeeewww -wee, it was horrible... who knew that leakings coming from every hole in your body could smell sooooo awful.. milk mixed with vaginal fluids and musty underarms is the real reason women are advised not to have sex for six weeks... hahahaha... sigh now it is so much better... soap and deodorant actually are effective again

- your words really do create your world... take a second to enjoy the little things...