Mar 30, 2010

go to sleep...

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go to sleep little baby... this is a short one... which is better?  your baby having regular, full length naps during the day and night-time wakings every 2 hours... or  your baby having a restless day, full of hearty cries, and night-time wakings every 4 hrs... hmmm i don't know... but i will say that its hard to sleep during the day while she naps.. and sleeping for more than two hrs straight last night made me and my hubby feel amazing... but on the other hand a sleep deprived baby is no fun.. oh well the jury is still out on this one

Mar 28, 2010

i believe i can fly...

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i believe i can touch the sky... oh yes after giving birth naturally to my child i felt invincible... like i could stand on top of my roof and shout... 'I AM SPARTA'... i mean what could be more challenging than pushing out a 8.5lbs baby... what could be harder... BREAST FEEDING... oh my gosh... you gotta be kidding me... breast feeding is no joke... screw all those mother and child photos that have the baby gazing pass plump breast into the mom's loving eyes...  cause my eyes were full of tears when my baby latched on... but not tears of love, they were full of tears to the heavens asking god to keep me from ripping this baby off my breast and throwing her across the room... i mean can you say OUCH... how could my darling, sweet, gorgeous new baby have full grown piranas living in her gums...  i feel like my nipple is in the middle of a wrench... this is unreal... my toes are curled and my butt tight because this little girl is literally sucking me dry...

with all the focus on a successful pregnancy and labor, i just knew that breast feeding would be a breeze... heck no... instead of a breeze it is more like a hurricane... my hormones are still all over the place... my organs are still trying to find their way back to their original location in my body.. and now my boobs have swollen and are LEAKING... no matter how informed you are about the human body, you still are shocked when you see your once sexy lumps, turn into Elsie....

i am telling you i wanted to give up... first of all, how could i with all my degrees not be able to get a tiny newborn to latch onto my nipple correctly, i felt like a failure, i mean shouldn't this female task come 100% naturally... i wanted to throw in the towel... 2nd of all, everytime she whimpered my husband and the rest of the world was looking at me to whip out my tit and shove it in her mouth... plus my husband insisted on asking me annoying questions like "how much (ounces) did she drink" and "how much is coming out"... i think he was convinced that not only could i produce milk but that i also had ex-ray vision and can see inside my breast... i wanted to punch him... finally i wanted to run to the store and spend my life savings on Similac formula... who cares that i had god-given liquid gold literally running through my veins, this mess hurt

sigh, nevertheless, i hired a great lactation specialist to come to the house and teach me some techniques and postions... she talked me off the ledge and told me that i was not the only chick to feel like this.. thus her fat pockets lol...  it was the best $100 i ever spent on my breast... after a serious breakdown with a hard, lip-shaking cry, a few days later... i decided to endure... i set a short term goal of breast feeding for one month and now i am 7days away from accomplishing it... i am getting into a rhythm which includes pumping enough for the baby to have for at least two daddy-feedings per day... oh well it is getting easier everyday and i will keep you posted... wish me luck

Mar 26, 2010

all i need is 1 minute of your time...

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wow... a second to write... i can't believe it... i have fed and  bathed the baby, even washed and dressed myself... i feel great... last night i slept alot... well a lot considering that i am a living cafeteria... she breastfed at 1am, 3:30am, i pumped and facebook chatted at 5am and then she ate at 5:45am then slept until 8:15AM... my baby is 21days old, three weeks... so amazing to see her grow and change everyday... i feel like we are getting a rythem... starting to know each other... i am a mother.. me, me... i am a mother... like i have a child... the other day i left her with my parents for 2hrs so that i could get my hair done... talk about seperation anxiety, i cried in the salon chair for the first 15mins and then called to check on her every 30mins to check on her... it was such a reality check that the human being that i had been nurturing and growing within me, every second for the last 10+months was really detached from me now... no longer were we physically one... in each others presence... sigh:( ... but we are still seriously connected... my breast filled up and told me when she had awakened from her knap and was ready to feed even though she was miles away... i love her more everyday... yesterday we fell asleep together in the same spot that i took a many of pregnancy knaps... when my eyes opened to see her beautiful face pressed up against me i calasped deeper in love with her... my sweet little baby mcLove... oops there she is... i hear your call baby.. bye bye blog

Mar 22, 2010

"Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You" World Premiere Baby Best!

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Mar 20, 2010

Facebook Friends Q&A

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Charity Pj - ok having trouble writing the blog about the birth... so much to say... well ask me a question about what do u want to know about my natural home delivery and i will answer it on my blog. got any questions? Wed at 2:33pm · Comment · Like

Q -Jessica Oglesby-
Did u use a doula along with your midwife? Wed at 2:39pm ·
A- No doula, I had a great birthing team including two midwives, my hubby, and a personal assistant. Plus my family prayed for me downstairs in our “waiting area”… my mom and sis-in-law came in room once I started pushing


Q - Erica Henlee-
How was the clean up ..I mean on those baby shows it can be messy-side note I have no kids :)Wed at 2:50pm ·
A - Lol, yes it was messy, but we were well prepared. We put a waterproof cover on the mattress and just discarded the sheets we used afterwards. Everything else was pretty easy to manage with towels. My home looks like nothing even happened

Q - Nicole Butler-Davis- When I get preggy I want to use a birthing as well...explain that whole experience from when contractions started and the underwater birth! Did the water alleviate the pain? Wed at 3:07pm
A- The water did help. I found that my body/muscles/mind were able to relax more in the water.

Q - Ashley Johnson and Maurice Cobb - Were you in water?
A - Yes i was in the water alot, but she was born in my bed.

Q- Jerome Schley-
What did your husband do. LolWed at 3:51pm
A - Jerome you are silly.... you know my man is a perfectionist so he was the ultimate coach, he was very well prepared and a great help and encourager the whole time, except when he slept on the couch for a few hours, but he needed the rest… he watched the entire birth, all of it, and was in charge of holding my left leg back, cutting the cord - and he cried afterwards... sooo sweet


Q - Amanda Crump Rate the pain. March 17 at 3:54pm ·
A - I can't really even describe the pain... it is something that you cant place... it was intense and repetitive... like a huge wave, surfs up.. lets just say I sounded like a strange animal mating in the woods.. lol… the best news is that once it's over you kinda forget all about it... some women actually have a completely pain free experience.. i think the mistake i made was thinking that it would only be a vagina experience but the reality it that it was a whole body experience... the day after ever muscle in my body was sore as if i ran three marathons. the privilege of birthing life came at a cost for me, but it was worth it to get the priceless gift

Q -Amanda Crump Did you have a moment where you seriously considered going to the hospital? March 17 at 3:55pm ·
A- yes mam... i was looking for a way out by any means... an easier way... but the truth is that there was no easy way out.. no short cut home... (rocky fans will understand) girl i was trying to drive myself to the ER, lol can u imagine.. I asked my midwife to just reach in me and pull her out… and I was dead serious… lol

Q -Amanda Crump - What was exactly the way you expected? What was different than what you expected? March 17 at 3:57pm ·
A- heck no... by no means.. i just thought that i would spend about three hours doing my thing... give a grunt, and hold my baby... but it was so much more... it was a journey in loosing control, in not being the ring-leader of my circus... re-surrendering my life to Christ, in falling into him, not just leaning on him, and fully trusting that his words were true.. it was a life-changing, beautiful experience.. where i realized that promotion requires sacrifice, that i am strong and capable only because allow God to reign in me... no matter how much i wanted to speed up the process, i was not in control... my body knew exactly what to do and when to do it.. I just had to wait…
Q -Kristin Moore - Wow great questions...I wanna know how many pushes b4 she came out? March 17 at 4:04pm ·
A- sigh, girl you gotta be kidding me... wow, cant count the number of pushes during three hours.. they kept saying "i can see the top of her head.. look at all that hair.. keep pushing her head is almost out".. i was like dang how big is this child’s head cause ya'll been saying this same thing forever lol

Q - Maurice Cobb- The baby came out in the water? can she breathe underneath there? Did you choose this just for you and the process or does this way have a better effect (mental, emotional, physical)on the baby then going to the hospital? March 17 at 4:28pm
A - yes babies can be born underwater, it is perhaps a smoother transition since they have lived in water for the entire nine months... they take their first breathe once you lift them out of the water... i chose to have a home birth because i did not want to have a medical experience that kept me confined to a room, on the timetable of hospital staff, hooked up to machines, and on meds that might cause me to miss this amazing rites of passage... i wanted to be alert, to feel the emotional euphoria of accomplishing childbirth.. but you should read my earlier blog titled " i'm every women" from august 2009 for more details of why

Q - Jaine Dhoe- How did you select your midwives team? what room did you have the baby in? have you left the house yet? do you think the water aerobic classes prepare you? did you freak out when she was swimming in the water? or did they allow her to swim in the water? Do you suggest natural birth since you've experienced it? March 17 at 7:05pm ·
A - i found my midwife online.. i had only one non-negotiable, i wanted her to be african american... but she was so much more.. she was full of 29yrs of personal and professional experience of homebirths...a wealth of knowledge and support.. I had the baby in our bedroom... only left the house to take baby to her one week check up... my body is still recovering... hmm did the water aerobics help? perhaps with my weight control but i dont think that it really affected the labor.. all the remedies seem to be just myths.. i think everyone's body is different and will respond differently to childbirth no matter what you do.. natural childbirth was the best option for me.. i highly suggest that other women take the time to review the many options available to deliver their babies and then make informed decisions

Q - Cecilia Rutledge Bailey - Heck yeah! Why in the hamfat did you decide to do that anyway? Oh I don't mean to be insensitive but I'm coming through the door asking for an epidural! March 17 at 11:13pm
A- lol lol that was actually the first thing that I said to my midwife once my child was completely out…

Q · Twanna Stevens Turner - Will you do this again for future children? Is it too early to think about? Was there any part of your birthing plan that you would do differently knowing what you know now?
A – blink blink blink… ummm ask me later about the other kids.. but I think so..nope I wouldn’t change the plan, well I would have had a hammer handy to knock myself out lol

Mar 11, 2010

CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON

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Time for celebration... 
after 33 hours of labor during an all natural home delivery... the newest addition to our family and heart has arrived... introducing 
McKenzie Love, 8lbs 8ozs, 21 inches

she is so beautiful, alert, and peaceful... except when hungry... lets just say her lungs work :)
the birth story is sooo amazing, its dramatic-encouraging-good and juicy... but i have not had time to blog yet... i  mean mckenzie is sooo entertaining...but i promise to get the details to you soon