hey where's the party at...

 well the celebration has begun... over the holiday we had our first of many baby showers...  one by my "former" job and the students that served and the other by my mom/sister... they were blast, full of oooooooos and ahhhhhhhhhhs, mouths dropping at the site of my protruding belly and also totally over measuring the ribbon for my belly (except for you big unc), funny games to prove that we are totally going to have the time of our lives being parents... the best part was all the support... like we had family members literally drive from out of town to celebrate and shower us with love... gosh we felt so very special and blessed to be surrounded by a great crowd of family and friends, the village necessary to raise a great child...  thanks sooo much for your generousity... enjoy the pics

Time keeps on ticking, ticking, ticking

Happy womb week to you, happy womb week to you, happy womb week sweet baby, happy womb week to you… Week 32…. Omg can you believe it, only 8 more weeks to go. Today me and my hubby sang this to our daughter through the layers of my body… we showered her with gifts of love and affirmation…  then we ate oatmeal and cake!!!  I know it was a bad breakfast but give me a break, I mean I am pregnant… It is such an exciting season… 5days ago we celebrated our semi-1^st Christmas together… we gave her the Pixar movie Up and the matching novel.  So far we are on chapter 3 and she is enjoying every minute of it… it is perfect for bedtime… well at least for me it is great, I always manage to fall asleep before my husband finishes his pages… we are saving the movie to watch during the beginning stages of labor as a distraction… this holiday break has been just fantastic… I feel like my hubby and I finally had quality time together… (of course baby best too; she was been a moving machine doing all kinds of acrobatics, thus the sore spot above my belly button wear my skin has torn from the constant poking of her elbow, which caused the worst itching that i have ever experienced - i tried to attend to it with ice and lavendar, then i rubbed some Benadryl spray on it lol) we have worked really hard, purging old items and finishing the baby room – which is soooo beautiful, sometime we just go in there and stand and smile… we have also rested/played hard… we went to the movies 3 times… that is a new record for our busy lives… I have loved every bit of it to remind me how blessed I am to be in this union of love (side note about the media we watched 1^st Alvin and the Chipmunks – good message but body movements/music were way too grown, I mean who has ever seen super sexy tree rats, sending wrong messages to all the little female toddlers in the audience with grinding; Avatar – very good despite the ugly creatures, great theme and imagination, sweet love story “I see you”;  Law Abiding Citizen – ummm my spirit could have done without all the violence and corruption, furthermore the youth counseling experience wished I could have reported all the parents who thought that is was cool to bring their young ones along with them to this vexing movie; I hope that I will be a parent that is willing to say “oh well guess I cant go” when I don’t have a babysitter)

funky cold medina

i have no idea what this song is about but it is perfect for this entry... because i have discovered another unmentioned part of pregnancy... BoDY Odor... like i use to do three shows in a day and never smell "musty"... now i take a shower and wake up in the morning to a 7th grader living under my arms... i cant believe how hot and sweaty i can get so quick, without effort... lol and to add to the odor list lets add the gas that comes out of my body.... it is horrible... like i try to run from myself but it haunts me slowly like micheal myers... perhaps i should start a stay at home business packaging it and selling it to the military for special missions.. lol...

gasp!!!  i hope that these smells are not hurting my sweet baby... she has been so active lately that my insides need a knap.. i mean i can literally see her practicing for her river dance audition and playing dodge ball... gasp!!!! maybe she is playing dodgeball with my gas bubbles... that just has to be it... the other  night after we read her a book, said our prayers turned off all the lights, rocked her with warm hands, and she was still up playing womb games having a blast... i was sooooooo tired and wanted to go to sleep soooooo bad... but who can sleep with a foot in your lung - lol

i love her soooooo much, she is growing so much and brings so much joy to my day already... she responds to our touch and songs... plus all the doctor's  reports are excellent now... what they thought they saw on an original ultrasound is completely gone, and she is perfect - in the top %tal of all babies... thanks God for your faithfulness... everyday my faith and confidence in you is growing more and more!! all i have to say to the lying enemy is HA HA boo in yo face
Happy 30 Weeks in my belly sweet baby best!!!  only 10 weeks to go before you are in my arms... keep getting better everyday precious girl... wow wee!!! u r the best gift ever... see u soon

you're a mean one..

mr. grinch!  i like ths funny holiday song... i don't like that i recently had a day reflective of the song... full of grime thoughts... this is not my typical M.O... the other night as i returned the car that i borrowed from my sister, my eyes whelmed up, tears was my reaction to the reality that my life is really changing... now let me just say that tears seems to be a reaction to positive and challenging things alike these days... but this time i think it was really valid... i have not been "unemployed" since i was 15yrs old... i have had my own car since i was 17yrs... and now, by choice, i find myself temporarily without both... now i am forced completely to lean on my husband... and of course GOD as always... but my husband to a new level... he is an excellent supporter and provider but for the last two years i felt like a substantial contributor... like a team mate who plays second string but nevertheless i still had a mean hit and was often used in the game...  i mean for the last 10+ years i have been a  Charlie's angel with a theme song sung by Beyonce... but now i really am a for-real for-real WIFE and he has is THE MAN of the house.. OMG i want to rebel against this thought somehow... maybe go out on my balcony and burn my bra... but as i look down at my bear feet and hugely pregnant belly i realize it's too cold for this foolish display...  but this is just it... shazam now i don't have a research project, or long day at the office to hide behind when dishes are left in the sink or dinner is leftovers... i have tired to put on my mrs. clever hat but after one load of darks and purging one bag of crap in the office my tailbone hurts and my body takes me hostage for a knap... wow, change is challenging

this is why you should just go with the flow.... be like the lion king's wart-hog and sing "hukuna matata"... what good are our covey planners, when the most high is really in control of all things...  so what that i had planned to top last years holiday travels to the slopes of Toronto by relaxing in a beach cabana with dear friends in the bahamas... this year i will be doing something much better - i will be practicing on my birthing ball and celebrating baby best at my first shower... eat your heart out single ladies - hahahahaha

now i know what my sweet hubby will say " you are doing more than enough by carrying and caring for   human life 24/7"... and i politely smile and relax as he kisses my forehead but my mind screams BAAA humm baaaag... yeah yeah yeah... i finally arrived to the dream life of a christian women... the ability to stay home and care for my body/baby while allowing my husband to lead to the fullest... people dream and pray for this luxery.. and i admit it was my prayer as well... to be the sole caregiver for my child and home... well one of the two is not even completely here yet and i am already having second thoughts...
but i am no fool ladies... please believe i pull myself together quickly, before my bacon winner pulls in the garage i  steam away the green grup in the shower and pull out my inner eartha kitt -lol- ummmm yep i still got it, just not as often lol

Happy Thanksgiving gobble gobble Week 27

this year i am more thankful than ever... i am grateful for such a sweet family, abundance of material goods,  and especially this new life in me... yesterday she turned 27wks old my belly ... and she already has such a great personality... besides the fact that she is building quite a skymiles account and also a fan base of adoring fans... i can tell that she really enjoys belly gymnastics and womb-aqua aerobics... she absolutely loves when her dad comes into the room and plays tag with her through my stomach walls and we have so much fun together playing hide and seek... happy 1st thanksgiving baby best.. can't wait to feed you sweet potato pie next yr!

"and I'll take... with me the memories..."

to be that sunshine, after the rain...it was fitting that my last week of work was shadowed with rain... perhaps the heavens were all-broken up about this transition too... after 7yrs at IHAD my official time has come to an end... the timing is perfect since now i have completed my duty of co-raising several non-biological kids and God has trusted me with one of my own... but either way letting go is hard... wait, pause, while i suck the tears back into my eyes.. wow i never imagined what a life-changing experience this job would be...it was the best job a recent college grad could ever ask for.. the opportunity to daily serve youth and influence them to achieve life success through educatiion was awesome, and for the last 7yrs i gave it all i had  - all my time, creativity, passion, and prayers... this job went beyond the scripted educational goal straight to my heart - where i loved and served these young dreamers like they were my own... now i see that we kinda all grew up together...  boy do i have some memories - bad and good... but all 100% worth it.. experiencing life happenings together...i must chuckle because some of my kids still have not fully accepted my 2yr old marriage yet and seem to work hard not to acknowlegde my pregnancy... while others cried over my engagement video and were estasically jumping in the middle of the street at the site of my baby bump...you know it was actually one of my kids who knew about baby best before we did... she had a dream about my pregnancy two weeks before i even had a clue... what a connection huh... OMG where is the tissue when you need it, my sniffling is going to wake up my husband...

as the last dreamer that i visited at college walked back into his dorm i knew that something had changed... that i had reached a new milestone... this stone had Acceptance written on one side and Trust written on the other... i must accept that the 8th grade students that i met 7yrs ago are now almost 21 yr old adults whom hold the outcome of their future in their own hands, i must accept that i did all that i could to prepare them for success by giving them a wide variety of life tools... and finally i must trust that God will continue to protect/guide them on their paths, and that they will call me if they get lost... or at least i hope so... (immature translation = oh  please oh please oh please call me for help) 

year 7 is a perfect year to transition out , you know since it is God's number of completion... but it still is hard... change and life tranisitions are scary and uncomfortable...  i knew that it would end one day buuuuuut... well, you know the big question... what now?.  i had this IHAD job down packed.... and now i am starting a new one, probably the most important job ever, being a full-time 365/24/7 MOM... how do you create a resume to qualify for this gig... it feels different when they are really your own, i am responsible for this child's upbringing and well-being,  no one else to blame for her life hic-cups but myself...  and i am going in full-force - no "new" career to provide an escape for 8hrs per day... OMG now talk about life changes... i have worked a steady job since i was 15yrs old... now i won't be a bread-winner but a bacon-cooker... (the best possible organic bacon-cooker that is lol)... now i wont be a tailored suit professional but a stay-at-home mom expected to breastfeed, homecook, and clean.... OMG my Masters Degree did not train me for this...sigh- Lord please make me domestic... nevertheless, here i come new job... i hear that the hours are long and that the pay is low, but i know the experience will be PRICELESS... so where do i stand in line to get my "certified mother"  name badge... but after 7 yrs it is just hard to walk away... i mean this group of people has experienced 2 degrees, a wedding,  cars, several trips, a boatload of hilarious life experiences, and now a pregnancy with me- sigh

what happened to the good ol days when people just clocked in, worked at their station for 8 hrs, and then clocked out without any emotional connection gosh!!!

i mean the reality is that these 30+ kids have prepared me for baby best like non-other..ohhh i have seen the attitudes, the drama, the excuses... and best of all, witnessed the success.. perhaps 18 years from now she will have them to thank for me knowing all the teenage trips and falls inside out, which therefore made me a "no mam, I'm sorry" parent.... lol

well  thanks boss lady, sponsors, and dreamers for trusting and working with me all these years... i truely love you and will forever hold dear our relationships..."it's so hard to say goodbye, to yesterday"

to learn more about this great job/organization visit http://www.ihad.org/

Can you tell me how to get...

did you watch Sesame Street when you were a kid... one of the few teaching songs that I remember from the show went like this... give me 5, give me 5, give me 1 2 3 4, but if you love me, more give me 5... this is the perfect song to represent this last month.. month 5 of pregnancy has been a blast... thank you lord... I have been enjoying being married and pregnant soooo much... I love my ever-growing belly... showing it off is so much cool... and my baby girl is so much fun... I am convinced she knows what time her daddy leaves and returns from work and is always ready for a game of patty-cake or tag with him... his head on my lap as he bonds with his little girl is soooo precious... ( but I have to stop the game after about 15mins because, unlike my hubby, I can feel all those love taps in my belly, she is strong) anyway get ready world cause I think she is going to be amazing... oh and I have proof... recently she has been practicing her gymnastics, African dance, and abstract water sculpting daily in my belly... unfortunately for me her rehearsal schedule happens right at the peak of my bed time... lol... i'm telling you, God knew that it would take us the whole 9 months to become self-less enough to be a parent.. I found myself, at 4am, begging this 24 week old girl genius to please chill out so I could go to sleep... but like her father, she seemed to be committed to completing the masterpiece she was working on... so after plenty of tossing and turning, praying and reading the word, and trying to spark a convo with my cationic hubby, I surrendered to her movement... I decided that 5 to 7am was a is a perfect time for a mother/daughter moment... so we went downstairs for cereal and a foreign movie... lol I love her so much and she makes me smile...

wow life is such an ever changing portrait... I love posing for it but think that candid shots are the best... you know the times life catches you in a surprise spot... without your best face on or prepared look.. it is in these life shots that you see the real you.. and can really measure your beauty... recently my hubby and I have been in this place where surprise snaps are flashing all around us... we are having to make some really grown up decisions about our future... it is kinda fun/exciting and kinda nerve wrecking since our choices now include baby best... we want nothing less than what is best for her and know that it is the actions that we do that affect her... ummmm I guess this is what makes parenting a promotion of joy and responsibility...

ps it is only 16 weeks to go... that means I have 112 days to work out enough to make my body a candidate for a quick and easy home delivery... ok so this means more walking and some non-yogi yoga... and some individual water aerobics since my class is over.. plus, most of all increase of prayer and positive reading to boost confidence...

pss welcome Fall... i cant see my feet anymore

psss oh yea and here is a follow up to my entry to the enemy...
I am pleased to say that she, our little girl - baby best, is PERFECT... all issues that the docs were concerned with were gone when we went in for the follow-up visit... the doc said " absolutely nothing to worry about except the Atl Braves and the weather but not our baby, SHE IS FINE"... all of her test came back above normal and she is developing in the highest percentile category...WOOOOO HOOO Thanks GoD... war in prayer works!!!

"Let's Get Physical, Physical.....I Wanna Get..."

I wrote this entire blog 90mins ago but my computer had a brain fart and lost it…. So let me try it again… please forgive if some of the original flavor was lost…

anyways the last 10 days have been great… we took a walk in the park and witnessed a mixed culture wedding that made me cry…we celebrated week 22 of prego-ness in the baby’s new cleared out bedroom after selling all of the old furniture on craig’s list…I went to the movies to see two new, excellent black cinema flicks… which means I am now able to stay awake past 9 pm without turning into a pumpkin… Taraji’s hair was the freaking bomb but unfortunately Chris Rock made me want to protest my perm and burn my weaves… I mean I am thinking about going natural just so I can look my daughter in her eyes one day and say “baby your hair is beautiful naturally.. just the way God made it”… plus I visited a few of my students at their colleges.. this means that I am now able to go out of town & back in a car without vomiting or falling asleep.. it was so great seeing my students fulfilling the academic dream… but let me just say that Baby Best might have it a little tough… all this practice with youth is making me very sharp… can’t get nothin’ past me, boo…

So physically I have been feeling just perfect… I am loving my new big belly and my new nipple-look-alike belly button… plus the bonus of no longer being afraid of physical intimacy has now freed me to enjoy life again!!! So life is good and being prego is fun… wait wait wait.. there was last night when I had horrible heartburn… I mean it was so bad I thought my eardrums were sweating and that my chest was going to explode… my hubby had to be on back-patting duty for 30 minutes until I burped out enough acid to go back to sleep… but other than that I’ve been fine… wait, well, oh yeah, I did have to go to the hospital…

The hospital… THE HOSPITAL… the hospital… WHAT??? Yes it is true, after 36 hours of excruciating, unfamiliar pain, I broke down and went to the hospital... the freaking arch-nemesis to my commitment to the world of natural living… but the pain was so strong, so frequent, so weird, I had to make sure all was well… not with me so much but with my precious cargo… plus, it hurt so bad I could not cry, my hubby kept asking me all these questions and singing/praying all loud, and I could not find the symptoms in any of the three thousand pregnancy books we have beside our bed… so I went to the hospital.. “dun, dun dun dun”… that is the scary dilemma music… I was being sucked into the world of social norms… I mean the pepto pink colored walls weren’t that bad after all... and the nurse was really nice… plus the sound of my perfect baby girl’s heart beating, feet kicking, and hands punching was hypnotizing me… and to top it off they showed me an ultra-sound and I could see her cute face hide and her body jump from the hiccups… awwww it was the sweetest site ever… perhaps I could learn to love this remote control bed…


But I snapped out of the delusion when the nurse came in to tell me that all the tests were normal and Baby Best was super great… and then she handed me a pain medicine that I had to take right then because I was unable to take it out of the hospital because it was a narcotic… A NarCotic… WHAT??? My hubby said that I instantly sprang up out of pain-curl position and said “get that shit out of here!!” lolololoolol I didn’t say that of course but I did ask for a Tylenol instead… I swallowed one and hid the other pill under the covers like the James Caan character in the 90’s flick Misery… then I hobbled myself out of there… came home and just thugged it out, embraced the growth

After researching the internet, I realized that my attempts to handle prego-ness like I an all-American White housewife, minus the cute dog, backfired on me… turns out that exercising 4 days in a row was good for the body but came at a high price… yep, the total was a full serving of pain – and the copay from me visiting the hospital of course.. it appears that I was just having round ligament pain… umm yep that’s right round ligament pain… I didn’t even know I had round ligaments… I thought they were all straight and rectangle-ish.. but it appears that my uterus is using the ligaments that surround it to bully my organs out of the way in order to make more room for Baby Best.. well it seems that the muscles/ligaments that have been holding my organs for the last 28yrs were like “hold up wait a minute” … this sparked a terrible internal conflict which caused me serious PAIN… but after another day of rest I was A-okay… and home is now more than ever where my heart is and where my baby girl will be born….

happy happy, joy joy 1/2 way there..

soooo many cute things for my little girl catches my eyes everytime i walk into any retail store... awwwwww this is going to be so much fun... i have a brand new fondness of other people's children in stores and restaurants too... like all of a sudden i notice the sweetness of Father's embraces or Mommy's looks... i see the adorable pigtails and hear the funny giggles... it is so touching

the last two weeks has been the best yet... baby best is moving and grooving... i actually have been walking and working out in the water... i try to run to the pool and jump in the water quick because lets just say i cant see my feet or my cha-cha to do any special grooming... plus i gained 4lbs this month which means i am no longer a food hater and can eat... and best of all I LiKE MY HusBAND again... like he has been looking so hot to me and i love having him around... this is so good because i was really worried last month that i might frown at him forever lol!!

omg and i must admit i love all the attention now... like i love that my body i no longer a indeterminable round but officially pregnant... i get extra smiles, passes to the front of the line, and pleasant nods from strangers..

finally happy 20th week of living my sweet baby girl... you have been doing such a great job growing and stretching, fully developing and being the best baby ever... you are half way to our arms and all the way in our hearts... keep up the good work see you in 20 more weeks

Uncensored Sidenote To enemy - "I'm a soldier"

Are you out of your mind satan... Dont u ever let my child's name come out of your lying mouth... God decides her destiny and He has declared that she is perfectly and wonderfully made.. the apple of His eye, hidden in His wings...BLESSED (Psalm 139:14, 17:8, Deut 28:4)... you have absolutely no power over anything in my life... you have no right to make any claim about her... let me remind you liar of a couple of truths... #1 this baby was set apart for this perfect time to be born out of a Godly love and covenant between my husband and I, #2 she ain't no cheap chick, for her life was purchased with the priceless blood of Jesus, and #3 remember you got fired from your position, kicked out, and then replaced by someone better for the job when God made me in His image... dont be jealous now that i do your past job of worshipping the living King better than you ever could do... wow I love singing praises to His name, God says that when I open my mouth to worship it is a sweet sound in His ear a beautiful fragance in His nostrils... that is why last night i ignored your negative rumors, wiped my tears, then spit and laughed in your face by WORSHIPPING my mighty God!

so please know that I have the authority to move mountains, proclaim life, and YES whip your lying ass... oh but you should remember what it is like to loose fights huh.. cause for three days MY Jesus beat you down for even trying to act like you had power over Him or His children... so shut the hell up liar... your voice annoys me like the bark of a unwanted mangy dog... note what happened to Old Yeller when he TRIED to buck up, act bad, and threaten the boys beloved family - he shot him dead... so DIE you lying dog... I think i will put on a Micheal Vick shirt today just to show my full support of removing useless dogs like yourself from the earth...

This is NOT the fight that you want, because I WILL WIN!!! What is written about me in God's word is not a joke... I AM A BAD GIRL... All authority (all power of rule) in heaven and on earth has been given to Me...I am strong and courageous... FEARLESSLY filled with power, love, and a sound mind... dressed in the whole armor of God which includes the shield of faith which STOPS the evil fiery arrows... No one will be able to stand up against ME all the days of MY life...the enemies who rise up against me will be defeated before me. They will come at me from one direction but flee from me in seven... (Matt 28, Deut 28, Josh 1, Tim 1, Eph 6) I think you get the idea you lying serpent spirit... but just in case you need a visual check out this video...punk your big roar means nothing when you try to attack my baby... in full confidence I GET REAL HOOD and me plus all my bold believing friends return in the unity of the Lord to whip your ass AGAIN!!! [in Jesus name of course :)]watch and understand

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LU8DDYz68kM