Pregnant-Dad! Being Pregnant for a Day...(by Husband)

After watching some great commercial, my wife dared me to be pregnant for one day. I almost didn't make it. This is the story. And I apologize for not being more empathetic to any woman who's carried a child.

"You can’t hurry Love..."

 ...no, you just have to wait, she said Love don’t come easy. It’s a game of give and take. The Supremes were exactly right. Maybe Diana Ross was pregnant when she wrote that song. Today I feel really pregnant. Very, very pregnant.  The muscle on the side of my stomach hurts from carrying this extra weight, or maybe from sleeping the wrong way. Either way, a pulled pregnant muscle sucks. Everything my husband says hurts my feelings. I cried this morning and this evening, somehow believing that his work projects are keeping our baby from being born, subconsciously sending her “stay in there, wait just a little longer” energy.  But despite my prego hormones, vanity still overruled as I sat in the hot Dominican salon to make sure my hair was pressed for the big event. What was sweet was that all the stylists wished me luck and said prayers to me in Spanish.  Now it’s 1 in the morning. I don’t know why I have heartburn, since I ate 4 hours ago, perhaps she’s saying I need to eat again. But mama said, "You can’t hurry Love, you just have to wait." Maybe this is what parenthood is really all about, give and take.

I give myself more water to obey the midwife orders, and then the baby makes sure I take myself to the bathroom every time I sit up/my feet touch the ground. The good thing is I’m saved. And God knows me so well. Just when the emotional roller coaster begins to peak, my God steps in and says, “it’s okay, daughter, calm down I’m right here. You’re almost there, you’re doing good.” I brushed that off with the waaahhh, waaahh, and allow the roller coaster to go down the emotional valley, just to allow Him to scoop me up, just as in His word in James 5, 7: “Be patient. Think about the farmer who waits for precious fruit out the ground. Be patient and strengthen your heart.” I love God and I love this baby, too.

 So world, I’ve been pregnant exactly, 277 days. O. M. G. Hear my heart when I say I’m grateful. I wouldn’t trade this blessing for the world. It’s just at this moment, the only song I have to describe it is, “The Never Ending Story…” Can’t you just see that big furry, fluffy monster laughing at me from afar singing, “The Never Ending Story…” What was that thing? Ok. Well let the record show that I just went on my last date without the need for a babysitter. Thanks, honey. Even though you get on my nerves. No, you didn't get on my nerves, what can I say instead of that? It's just that my nerves are on the outside of my stomach because my skin has stretched so far that they're easier to get to. And my uterus is playing Ding Dong Ditch with me (i really want to use the non-pc urban name, LOL).

Remember,

"You can't hurry love

No, you just have to wait

She said trust, give it time

No matter how long it takes".... i love you baby

What would I look like if I were a girl? (by Husband)

Bear with me, this'll be my most cerebral entry yet. What would I look like if I were a girl? This question and many more puddle my thinking with profound and complex questions that mainly lead to nothing but thoughts of what lies ahead. I am definitely an internal thinker. Even in my conversations with the Lord, I find myself peacefully in the inner sanctum of reasoning with God as if we’re chatting over a leisurely game of chess in heaven’s foyer. Thank you, Lord, for making me a father. For blessing us with a child. At first, I was gonna wait to call myself a father until my child breathed its first breath on its own, but sure enough Charity’s body has two heart beats. Why shouldn’t I claim the life of my child since he/she is indeed living? And I am determined not to allow fear any place in this pregnancy. So, I am a father, and Lord, you are so faithful and good to me. There is nothing I could’ve done to deserve such a promotion. And already my life is changed. This time, I haven’t even needed to persuade myself into thinking I’m different. My nature is changed. I simply am a new man. Both in my words, and in spirit. So I ask again, what would I look like if I were a girl? If Charity’s womb is the factory of lilacs and roses, will she look like me? Or will she carry on the curvaceous, gentle and sweet, loyal nature of her mother? And if a boy, will he think in songs like his mother? Will he be both creative and meticulous like his father? Will he draw pictures with his left hand? Oh, so many delightful memories to create. God is so good. I have so many things to look forward to, I don’t know where to begin. It keeps me up at night, even now, writing my heart’s desires at 1:26am on the first of September, my favorite month.

The "Maybe" Baby (by Husband)

I've had my first dose of "Maybe I'm not ready for this" today, when Charity woke up pregnant again, and I just got up like normal forgetting that she couldn't move as fast, like....dang, That's right. She's pregnant! Ah.....and then you know how you try to fix things since you're the man?! Well only if I could crawl into her back and massage each one of those aching back muscles and tell her organs to move over and make room for the baby... I hate seeing her so uncomfortable at times, and not be able to do anything but pray. And one time while I was praying, she told me to shut up because I was trying to rebuke a normal pregnancy symptom, LOL! Oh what laughs we have. Marriage is the best. If dudes knew how good we actually had it, they'd get saved just to get married!

The Business of Being Born...a Girl (by Husband)

I’m going to be someone’s daddy! This thought alone is enough to spark its own entry, but I’ve expressed these thoughts so many times, it’s only right that I jot down these words and cathartically move on to more mature pre-daddy pregnant thoughts. Most people ask me what I’m having, and what I WANT to have. Are you kidding me? A healthy baby! What has happened in our culture that has gotten us so caught up in what the sex will be? How is it possible—before I go on, I am well aware that in some foreign cultures, a woman’s value may be so low that parents consider the birth of a baby girl worthless, and though I find it completely ridiculous, I’m reserving this next thought for our American culture—for someone in today’s time to be so bent on having a child of a particular sex, to the point where if they have a child of the reluctant sex, that they neglect the child? Isn’t that bogus? Have we forgotten that it is GOD who chooses not only conception, but the exact weight, sex and genes of our child, if we are indeed even fortunate enough to get pregnant? I guess I sound too formal and much more like political soap-boxing than blogging, so I digress. I said all that to say, I’m so glad that we’re pregnant, and I will let God do God’s business in choosing the sex of our child. Be it boy or girl, I will love them, as I already incredibly do, with all of my heart, devotion and energy, for as long as my heart beats fast.

Talk to the Belly / How Men Try to Understand Pregnancy (by Husband)

It's such a humbling place to see my wife talking to the heartbeat inside her belly. Some days it's soooo real, and the next, it's abstract all over again...until she starts reading the baby a book, or singing him/her a song. Then I wish I could feel that connected all over again. God is so good. For the first time, a couple days ago I woke up and forgot that we were pregnant. (Moment of silence) I’m reading “The Expectant Father” an excellent book given to me by the best coworker in the world, Nicole. In it, it says that pregnancy for men can be sort of “abstract,” where we don’t have the same kind of connection that the woman has. A woman is pregnant 24 hours a day, on weekends and holidays, day and night shifts, for 40 weeks straight. There is no off time, coffee breaks, lunches “out of the office.” Thus, I cannot relate, LOL!!! I feel this strange blend of emotions that range between guilt, awe, wonder, sympathy and compassion over my wife’s uncomfortable joy. I can’t push, can’t vomit for her, can’t take the pain away, can’t move the baby or her organs into peaceful positions, cant ensure she won’t wake up in the middle of the night as hungry as a bear out of hibernation. And because of this, it makes me want to do everything I can to ease the load everywhere else for my queen. If you’re a man, you’ll understand. If you’re pregnant, then understand that this is probably what your husband feels but can’t really put into words without sounding as crazy as I did in saying I “forgot” we were pregnant one morning when I started my morning routine.

Ice Cream in the Microwave (by Husband)

Charity is going to have a natural, at-home birth! She is amazing and I support her all the way. Please pray for us. I am all of a sudden a worker bee who wants a new house, new car, new job, new life that is the best for the baby. It's so exciting. I'll be rushing around off adrenaline to accomplish as much as possible, and then Charity'll say: "Babe, take the pressure off! You're a good enough provider for me..." But do you know the pressures of being a man and wanting to give the very best? The pressure to provide more than we had; nothing but the very best for my children. That is what my father gave me, and I’d be damned to give anything less to my children. But (sigh) what a relief to hear those refreshing words from my wife? “You’re a good enough provider already…” Women take note. This is what you say to melt away your husband’s stress faster than you can soften ice cream in a microwave!

Entry 2, Week #10: The Promotion

Have you ever worshiped so hard that you knew a nap was in the near future… this morning I am sooo in love with the Lord. Just his simple word brings me to my knees in worship… for his kindness towards me… and all his great promises. I fall deeper in love with Him daily… this baby is going to be blessed. Today my Big Daddy told me that in Deut. 28:4… that alone had me on my face in the most awesome worship…the kind where the neighbors might wonder “What’s that noise?”... don’t worry its just me showing my gratitude to such a worthy King… I am so excited and so privileged to be in this position… my Father trusts me with such an awesome promotion… Thanks Lord

Entry 1, Week #9: I am going to be a blogger

Well here it goes.. I am going to be a blogger..

What has this kid done to me… Well besides turning my appetite upside down, all around… and making a traditional morning activity like brushing my teeth a scene from a horror movie…

It has turned my heart to mush without even being able to smile yet.

All of my thoughts are about how I can make the best personal decision for this new human being… (which, might I add, solidified its gender this week… I am so proud of you, you little sex organ grower!)

Anyway, the whole world is so excited about your arrival… Yes, that is right. The whole world… everywhere I go and everyone I tell are so excited (like, my baby is like a “Cheers” star)… Even my plane mate “goo-gooed” and raved about all the joy this baby was going to bring…

So I thought the best way to keep this excitement going for the world was to tell all my updates through this blog… my pregnancy blog… oh yeah, HI I AM Pregnant... Wooo Hoo!… ok, so stay tuned.